I've decided to take a break from blogging for a bit. To be honest, I'm sick of my writer's voice and am even annoying myself. My insomnia has given me lots of hours of introspection. The past few weeks I've disassembled my personality and tried to put back only the pieces that are good. It's not easy to complete a puzzle that is missing pieces and I find myself trying to reinvent myself, trying to stretch and grow to fill in the missing parts. I realized I still had a lot of growing up to do. I realized that there were things about me that made me miserable and must be making those around me at least annoyed at worst tortured. I've been working on being more mellow, giving Carter more independence, not freaking out over small issues, wearing make-up (shocking isn't it), complaining less, etc. I think I have underestimated myself a lot which makes people underestimate me which makes me sad. My fault entirely and now I'm trying to undo all I've done. I've been calling it a midlife crisis but my close buddy says it's not. So maybe I'm just slamming myself with lots of growth opportunities then? Anyway, please stand by while I try to get everything right this time around. On another positive note, Matt told me that he's the happiest he's ever been. That does make me happy and encourages me to keep going on the positive changes I've been making. When I've felt overwhelmed I've told myself my latest motto that I heard on tv a few weeks ago "Suck it up, buttercup." So that's what I am doing and the thing is that when I blog it is too tempting to complain so I'm just going to take a break until my personality makeover is complete.
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7 comments:
I will miss your updates but I hope this time will be well spent for you. It's hard to be introspective and examine our characters and personalities. I admire you for doing it! I'll watch for your next update when you are ready. Love you!
I accept your application for a sabbatical, but look forward to your return.
no blogging? what the...????? :) I haven't blogged for like 2 months, so i understand, however, i don't think that you complain much. Guess what?...I got a Thanksgiving point pass. :) yay! now we can really play...and make your trips a little less peaceful! :) haha
I like your personality, don't make it over too much! I'll miss your blog, don't stay away too long!
We love you! I look forward to your return.
I think we all go through times when we decide to make over some part of ourselves. Thank goodness we're not all perfect - how boring would THAT be? :)
I like you just fine the way you are. Just for the record. :)
But I hope you have a refreshing break from blogging, if that's really what you feel you need right now, and come back soon to us to tell us all about it.
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